DIVORCE 101

YOUR DIVORCE RULE BOOK 

Reducing Chaos 

Divorce creates chaos. The chaos is caused by changes in residences, self-perceptions, finances, social relationships, and parenting. The rule book by which you have been living your life has been destroyed. 

When this happens, you may find that you behave in ways you never could have imagined. 

You may regress to a second adolescence and involve yourself in risky or self-destructive activities. You may find yourself drinking excessively or experimenting with drugs. You may leap into ill-advised romantic relationships in an effort to replace what you have lost. 

For the best outcome for yourself and your children, you want to reduce the chaos of divorce to a manageable level. Keeping the chaos under control will help you progress through the grieving process that is a normal part of the divorce. 

Below are some temporary rules to follow during your divorce until you are able to rewrite your own. These rules for minimizing chaos fall into three categories: 

1.Limit Change: If it isn't broken, don't fix it; if it doesn't have to be changed, don't change it.

2. Protect People: Protect your children first, yourself second (and yes, your spouse third).

3. Protect Your Financial Position: Provide for necessities, protect assets, and pay bills.